Live in relationship is one of the most viable option to many aspiring youth, who wish to hit a balance between work – life balance in big cities. Some use live in relationship as a prior step for marriage. But before committing yourself into a live in relationship, there are many aspects and precautions to consider, especially if you are a woman.
Start with suspicion – You know him since a long time all right, you have spent a lot of time with him already. But this is for the first time that you will be spending days, weeks and months together with him. There is a difference between short appearances and long roles. Ask yourself many a times,
Are you ready?
Is he the guy?
Is it just infatuation?
Is it the right time or can you wait for a couple of months?
Is there any chance of early breakup?
Security – Trustworthiness
Always before committing to live in relationship, just make sure that you feel secure with him. Feeling of love, comfort and security is crucial before you start living with him.
Your place or his place or a new one?
It will be ideal if the place is near to your other friends or colleagues.
Sexual relationship is quite common while living in. Can you say to him like – “not today”..?
Does he have patience and self restraint? If yes, then green.
Have you got any doubt that he is doing all these for sex? If yes, then RED.
Work life balance
Have a detailed discussion regarding work timings of you both and how would each of you give time to each others?
Is he completely loyal to you? and you..?
The level of mutual commitment is higher in live in relationship, than in a love relationship. Hence, mutual loyalty is the very cornerstone of your life. Hint of disloyalty may end up in severe consequences.
Having a clear discussion about financial sharing and how both of you would pull the life cart forward is very necessary.
Do your parents know?
It is very essential that your parents or at least a couple of elders in your family and your friends know with whom and where are you living.
Coping with his friends, hobbies and habits
Living with him means knowing and coping with friends, hobbies and habits. Make sure to check the quality of his friends. It is also a better idea to discuss about your live in plans with a couple of his friends.
Make sure that the place of living is fully sophisticated with domestic gas connection etc. to avoid problems.
Your secrets – how much to let him know?
Things like facebook and email passwords, bank account details, your actual salary, your passport etc – better that all these are safe with you and you only.
Knowing when to breakup
Let him know very clearly up ahead that single mistake, simple disloyalty, bad behavior will have the contract terminated.
Back up plan – What ifs?
Always have answers and be ready for –
1. What if he suddenly becomes arrogant at a night?
2. What if he comes home fully drunk?
3. What if he starts smoking heavily in your room?
4. What are the steps involved in break up?
5. If it is a break up, who will leave the place and go away?
Always remember, prevention is better than cure.